((((((((((((((((((mybestkids2)))))))))))))))))))))))
i believe it does get better. i was thinking just today that ive been feeling crappy and depressed and negative but im STILL better than i was this time last year and this time 10 years ago doesnt even bear thinking about nevermind this time 15 years ago. i dont know when this happened or how. all i know is i havent given up. i havent gotten off the waltzers despite being so close at times and somehow im making that progress. its too small to measure in days or weeks or even months but its there. tiny baby steps gets us there. we do only what we can each day, each minute and somehow the pain eases. even if todays step is only that im going to stay in bed and cry for the whole day - im going to give myself the freedom to do that if i can and then after that im going to do X (get one positive thing done like pay a bill, wash some dishes, put on a washing whatever).
please though if you are feeling unsafe do reach out IRL. call your doc or pdoc or T if you have one. call a crisis line or go to the ER if you dont. you are too precious an individual to not take care of yourself.
check back in with us when you can please and keep writing. you are worth the effort.
hugs
biiv