It seems that many of us fear losing something if we enter a relationship and we let our fears keep us back. I understand completely after so much hurt, or deceit, or control by others. Even out of love, the males in my life (father, brother, sons, etc.) try to show their love for a woman by being dictatorial, without even realizing it. I got so fed up with being condescended and parented by partners. I now fear that the only way to find a man is to allow him to feel like he controls teh reigns and his decisions help everybody. It almost seems like I am parenting again when I date. I can't tolerate that anymore.