I'm not saying this to be harsh. I think that you should talk to your doctors. "Normal" people assume that everyone has good parents. They can't fathom the fact that some parents have no maternal/paternal bones in their bodies and are just crappy parents. I know you still want your parents to be the parents that they never were, but in my experience....this isn't ever going to change. I think that it would help you to talk to a therapist who can help you process all of these issues with your family and help you move forward. If you can get to the point where you can accept that your parents aren't going to be there for you, then things may improve for you. I'm a bit older and still trying to accept that my mother is never going to be the mother I want/need.