Hi Dorsey,
Intimacy is tough for me. Those who are/have been close to me have always been a friend before a lover. Its easier for me to share with a friend--somebody I am not concerned about with sex or dating. After I know a friend has accepted me, I feel comfortable enough to take it to the next level.

Even when somebody becomes my lover, I have a difficult time letting them in too far. Its like I have an imaginary line that it is hard for people to get across...I think part of it is that as a child, I could not trust the adults in my life to take care of me--I had to take care of myself. In the past, those who did get close to me, abused me. I started protecting myself by not getting close to anybody. So, now it is hard for me to allow another person to get too close--to be a part of me--I've been on my own since I was a small child. Old habits die hard.