Many times the suicidal thoughts will go away if given some time to heal and depression lifts . The act is very hard on families mostly .Euthanasia for medical reasons is a whole different story .
Most people have had these thoughts but recovered to have good lives .
Smoking was not morally accepted by many cultures and religions, it only prevailed by greed . Turns out smoking is a huge drain on society and the health system . Society is turning against smoking again .
Sugar and fructose are similar health dangers added in massive quantities to our foods . Greed wins again .
We need to spend much more on mental health to to make as much progress as the rest of the body treatments . . Old ideas about Freud type treatments don't work very well . Some of the drugs being used can cause huge problems .
I've been there before ,I know the mental pain is overwhelming, I fought my way out more than once . I had a plan- it was very doable , it was easy but it would trash my family mentally and economically. I stood before the edge and made my choice, sometimes that's all it takes ,knowing that its in your hands and walking away .
I hope you get thru this painful time . Talk helps, time helps ,exercise helps.
My best advice came from claire weekes on you tube . I hope you can find someone you respect and will help you out of your bad mental ills . Try to find positive help don't go negative .