Quote:
Originally Posted by DBTDiva
How long ago did you break up? You also seem to still be rather emotionally intimate with him, given than you are still communicating with him and he confided in you that he visited a sex worker. It's difficult to move on from a romantic relationship if that person is still a part of your life. I am friends with most of my exes, but there needs to be some time passing to get over each other before you get close as friends.
I think it's normal to not be able to imagine being with other people - especially since he was your first sexual partner. Everyone is different. I think it's good that you're being gentle with yourself and not trying to rush moving on. Getting over a breakup can be a slow process. After my last breakup, even though I have been in many relationships, it was difficult for me to imagine wanting to be sexual with someone new. It took about a year for me to not feel that way. It was a big love and a tough breakup so opening up that part of myself to someone new wasn't something that was easy to imagine when I was still in pain. Give yourself time to heal.
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Thank you for your comment, I really appreciate it. I haven't spoke to him in a few months. After he disclosed that he'd been with someone else, it changed how I saw him and I couldn't talk to him without thinking of that. I don't think we'll ever speak again. I'm glad he told me but it ruined my view of him and really tainted every memory of our relationship. I'm not sure he could have ever loved me if he did something like that right after me.
I think I'm going to be very slow to get to know someone else because I don't generally trust people and I have unfortunately met more people who mislead than not. I dont like that in getting to know someone I have to just trust that they'll tell me the truth. There's too much that I can't know. Like women dating my ex can't know all the things he did to me and I had no idea those same things were done to his other exes, until I researched myself. I don't want to have to research anyone else but unfortunately most people will have a more extensive dating and sexual history than me, so I'll end up either just staying single or doing that research when I start dating.