Hi Dorsey. While my situation was not the same, I can relate. I was raped by my ex husband 1 month into our marraige. That was 6 years ago and I still can't deal with it. I am however in a really good relationship. But like DepressMe said....you will have to build a friendship with someone before you can do anything else. You WILL have to have a lot of trust. DH and I were friends before anything, he knew my sistuation with the ex and the abuse. I don't know you...but I hate to hear you say that you feel as though you are "damaged goods". You are a strong person.....we all are for making it through the things we have. There are times were I feel as though the whole world is caving in....as I'm sure many of us do. But you are not damaged goods. And you are not alone.
I'm not sure if I have really helped you, but wanted you to know that I read your post and that I hope and pray nothing but the very best for you and the life you have ahead of you. One day, the right thing will come along. And although you will probably always have to "deal" with this I hope it will get easier for you and you will have someone in your life to love you, accept you, be patient with you, and be there for you in any and every way possible....In the mean time....You have to be happy with you in order to be happy with someone else.