Very triggering thread....I'll try to hold back...lol
My T abruptly made big boundary changes in February/March, without ever discussing it with me at all, or even telling me she was doing it. She just let me figure it out on my own. Then it was one thing after another. Supportive touch stopped, extended hugs, disclosure, the use of the word "love" (she would sometimes sign her Emails "Love, T" and even told me she LOVED me a few times), fewer texts returned, and Emails, when responded to, were quite short, even though she kept encouraging me to Email. I was not one who constantly bugged my therapist by phone/email/text, nor was I having any major crisis every other week. After holding me when I cried, telling me she loved me, and being super supportive and present, it all stopped. No warning. No talk. Not until a few weeks later when I really started to notice that things changed and I brought it up, did she ever talk to me about it. For nine months I've been suffering still. I was so fragile, so broken, it has affected my relationships in my life, my depression has drastically increased, and my self worth gone. I had felt quite bonded to this therapist and wanted to try to work it out somehow. I figured with time, I'd feel better. I'd get better. I'd get OVER this. I'm still struggling. My T knows what this has done to me, and is very apologetic now (although at the time, she was only apologetic for how I felt, not what she did or didn't do). I've still been having a hard time with it......and have been struggling very much to try to feel that trust and connection again that I once felt with my therapist (come to find out that's why she did those things, to help me to trust her).

I have an appointment next week with a second therapist. This is a big step for me. I hope you and your therapist can work this out. Unfortunately, as much as I love my T, I'm being held back. Maybe this new T can help me move past it so I can continue working with my T, or maybe I will find this new T will be a good fit for me, and I'll just see her. Who knows. It breaks my heart to think about leaving old T, but she's right. If I can't move past this, therapy with her may not be beneficial to me.