My heart goes out to you. It seems your t meant to have your best interests at heart, but, I don't think she thought things through thoroughly enough. At best, she should have worked with you to ween you off the emails as opposed to just cutting you off altogether. She also should have discussed this change with you before taking it upon herself to implement it without any warning to you. Her way of handling the situation makes it very unfair.

I actually give you a cheer for sending her the note you sent her. Childish or not, that had to have felt good, right?? Good for you. I hope her holidays suck, too!

Consider it a transition. Consider using email if you wish not to get response but as a way to simply vent/share what is on your mind, knowing you will bring those topics up in session to be visited and processed in session (which is probably a better way to process this kind of thing anyway).

Some people here have talked about having an ongoing weekly email that they don't send, or that they send a day or so before session as a way of communicating what they need to work on in session. Others have simply kept a therapy journal where they write down what is on their mind and bring it with them to session as points to work on when they meet with their therapist.

Your therapist is still your therapist, able to work with you and support you in session, but her message is that most things can and need to be discussed in session rather than via email, and she seems to believe you may be relying more on email and a need for quick response (and that relationship ideal that the therapist is there for you all the time rather than in session).

I know the change is difficult to accept, and I am sorry you are hurting.

Im sorry this is happening.

My first thought is she should realize a change in a boundary surrounding established support and comfort is best done gradually. There needs to be a lot of discussion. The new boundary needs to be fully explained. You need the opportunity to ask questions and explore how you feel about it...vent, if you need to.

I would feel angry and rejected, too, over such an abrupt change without discussing it first.
"That (perfect) relationship doesn't exist and I have to realize it and grieve it." ?
Are you kidding me? How cold!

My second thought is...it sounds like she made this all your fault. She has taken no ownership in it...whether she has created this new boundary because she realized it was too much for her, or whatever. She is the one who created the e-mail boundary in the first place. She has some blame if it has gone awry, doesn't she?

I may be wrong but I find it difficult to believe she changed the boundary only because it was in your best interest.