Yesterday was my final session before T stopped for the xmas period. She has scheduled an appointment for the 5th of January, so just shy of 3 weeks. We have been talking about some heavy stuff, and I know she has found it heavy too as she cried once and keeps doing the whole hands to face, gasp, shock thing.

My T has said that as it is private practice I can email her outside of sessions. I told her I would try not to.
In yesterday's session she said I can email her over the break and she will email back if I say I would like her to (after we spoke about her not answering before in an email she asked for).

The thing is she said she didn't want to transgress my boundaries. I don't have boundaries as such where this is concerned, but I am worried about transgressing hers as she has a young family and it is xmas. She knows how hard this xmas will be for me, but I'm still not certain I will be comfortable emailing her even if I actually need to because I don't want to pull her down during her time off with her husband and kids.

I know she said I could, but the question is - should I?

I can't explain really how tough this Xmas is going to be for me, but I had a huge anxiety attack about my family coming to my house last month and now I have to spend Xmas there and it will throw up all sorts of feelings and triggers.

Sorry I'm rambling now



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