Yes, I do actually believe that it’s all about me and I’ve never gone out of my way to hide that fact unless a situation came up where hiding my true nature would be beneficial. My whole world, inner and outer experiences… It all relates back to myself because I am what is always of primary importance because I see myself as an omnipotent/omnipresent divine being. That’s the way to sum up how I “work”. It is all about me, all the time.


My therapist recently asked me an interesting question: How can I, as a Narcissist, look at myself objectively?


The answer is I can and I cannot at the same time. The honest truth of the matter is that obviously by my very nature I am extremely self-aware yet oblivious to everyone else at the same time. When I first read the diagnostic criteria for NPD, I was a bit surprised for a moment I will admit. It was like acing a test I did not even know I was taking. The surprise was extremely transient, and I moved into a state that is my “normal”: I was diagnosed with NPD and I turned it around in my mind to be a good thing. I do not see the diagnosis as negative. I can put on a good act of listing off what a professional sees as “dysfunctional”, but it is all pretense on my part. Ditto with laypeople who ask me if I care at all about “changing” and if I desire said “change”. No. I do not.


Empathy is not a capacity I have at all. I have a level of “cognitive empathy” but not much as I am far too absorbed in my own world and focused on what I want, to look all too far beyond my own reflection.


I don’t see anyone else as on the same level as me. I am superior to everyone, and you’d be surprised how many people actually truly agree with my assessment. I have many admirers, and for several it is a straight up obsession with me. Obviously, I have no issues with this. I would make an excellent cult leader of any kind because I am so dominant and socially aggressive. I am also exceptionally charismatic and I have always used that personality trait to my benefit and of course I don’t care about whomever I drive into the ground in the process.


Do I know that my behavior is harmful to others? Yes and no. Unless I am doing something on purpose to get revenge on someone, I honestly have no idea when I am harming someone and if said someone tells me that I am “hurting” them somehow… I openly scoff at them and tell them they must be crazy. How can I be “hurting” someone if I have no idea that I’m doing it supposedly? It makes no sense!


Why would I have empathy for anyone else? Frankly, I see empathy as a huge weakness and it automatically makes someone inferior in my eyes/mind. I do not care about empathy. When it is brought up as being the holy grail of what makes someone a “good” person, you will find me being openly dismissive, arrogant, and condescending while I give people an education about how empathy doesn’t make you good just because you have it. Like wow, congratulations; you’re an inferior peasant! Think you’re special and a paragon of virtue? You’re not. You’re just like every other loser on the planet! Yes, this is honestly what goes through my mind and yes I have actually said things like this openly with zero shame at all. How stating the truth “hurts” people, I don’t have a clue. All I am doing in my mind is stating the truth.


“Exploitative”, oh people say that like it’s a bad thing! Yes, I always get what I want and I don’t have a problem with “using” people to get what I want. Everyone “uses” people whether they admit it or not. Everyone is selfish on some level. So really, in all frank honesty, I literally do not see how people see Narcissists as so destructive.


Inferiority complex? I think that entire idea is blatantly ridiculous. I love myself, and all the inferiors say, “How can this be? It can’t be true!” so they came up with this cute little theory about Narcissists secretly hating themselves. I find this entire issue laughably incorrect. Just because most people feel inferior (and that’s because they are), doesn’t mean that I “feel” that way “deep down”. I certainly do not. HA HA HA.


So, what do I “feel”? Typically, shallower than average things such as excitement, happiness, amusement, boredom, and the like.

The only emotion I feel with marked intensity is rage. However, it takes quite a lot for me “lose my temper”. If someone angers me, I typically respond with a few “personal attacks” against the person and then my anger dissipates rapidly and I’ll forget about it entirely in all likely hood. I put “personal attacks” in quotes because I do not see it that way, that is how other people see it. I see it as me telling the truth because I know people and how they work despite my incapacity for empathy. I find that the truth is the best weapon when someone calls anything about myself and my character “wrong”, because that is a blatant lie. There is nothing “wrong” with me, how I think/feel, my inner motivations, or how I interact with the outside world based on my inner life. I am superior, and if someone is too stupid to realize that and dares to start lying to my face then of course I will give then an education that will last a lifetime.


A single piece of writing cannot come close to covering everything about how my narcissistic mind works, but this is a response to some commonly asked questions. You’re welcome.