I seem to interrupt my progress and forward motion by looking back at the things that hurt and triggered me. This increases my pain and doesn't solve it. Maybe if I accepted that it did happen, I was deeply effected , it shouldn't have happened but bad things do happen and I can't change what happened. But..trying not to think about it just makes it worse. Maybe if I go ahead and think about it..write about it..maybe it will finally settle. I don't know and an upsetting event today didn't help much.