Sky is right -I think most of here who suffer from depression can relate to how you are feeling - I just finished writing my T with the same thoughts - just want to not wake up some morning but committment to continue on with life regardless of how my self-talk tells me I'm bad. My T keeps telling me I need to change my self-talk to be positive - look at my accomplishments and stop dwelling on my failures. As he says - it sounds simple but it isn't easy (and, so far, I have not made much progress with it). But do try to think of each day, each moment as independent from the past and the future. Live for each day, each moment. Therapy helps, a lot, but it all takes time - lots of time and it is hard to be patient as we work our way through the mazes we have created of our lives. And for some, like me, the prisons of our minds that we have created for ourselves. All we can do is to keep trying...