I imagine that must be quite unpleasant for you. I guess that's what makes you conflict avoidant, right? It's heartbreaking in a way. On one hand you're hurting over something that is obviously a big deal to you, on the other you're acting like it's fine because at that moment you can't deal with it for whatever reason. And I guess in the long-run, this causes you more discomfort/anxiety. What kinds of hurtful experiences would cause disassociation? What is it about these experiences that trigger anxiety? I guess I'm trying to understand what's going through your head when the perceived hurtful experience occurs that makes you want to avoid the issue at all costs. Like, something triggers the anxiety, right?

I replied to your covert narc thread by the way, not sure if you've seen it.