I sorta have advice...and sorta just letting you know i understand...

earlier...my boyfriend and I lived 10 hours apart and he was active in the Marine Corp...it was very hard especailly since he put in long hours (sometimes a 48 hour shift straight) and i couldnt see him and then we would sit on the phone not talking because he was so tired...but would do nothing about it...sometimes he didnt have a choice...this kept up for about three months....then i asked him one night after a long night of silence....Tell me one thing that is going on significantly in my life right now....and he couldnt, so i hung up with him and we spent a week apart from each other, and he then realized what he needed to do, if he didnt take care of himself, he didnt take care of a relationship and if he didnt take care of a relationship then i wouldnt be there. ...that really struck a cord with him...now we are together and he has school and he has work....and he keeps a close hold on how he keeps our relationship...but he does loose his sleep....and i cant tell you how many times i yell at him to do his homework and to get to work earlier....and when he gets angry at me for being angry....i look him sqaure in the eye and just calmly say...If i didnt love you I wouldnt care, I love you and therefore I want you to take care of yourself and in the end being able to take care of me (men are very simple..no offense to guys but we all have different thinking) See men see it as their job to protect us and make sure their family is taken care of ....they will end up doing everything at once and neglect themselves thinking they are doing whats best for their family....so if you turn it around (reverse pyschology) and say if you take care of yourself your taking care of me ...he might just listen....now my bf still does this stuff....but thats why i am here..thats how i balance everything...that is a womans job in a relationship (not trying to sound...womanizing or anything) but we balance things...we restore peace and love and all that jazz....while it his job to protect you and care for you, you have to restore balance....so you will never exactly get him to stop stop...but perhaps you can think of creative ways to get him to bed earlier....explain to him how its affecting you....and he will stray and stay up late again...and sometimes you just gotta honk the horn to get his attention again...but remember you love him...and that you are willing to do this as he is willing to help you through your troubled times and horrible moments....and if he is in one of those moods..sit him down...give him a massage....cook a favorite meal...and ask him...why do you feel like this...then tell him its ok to feel like that....and let him go through it...give it recogniztion and realize he needs to express his moments...just call him on it earlier if you can and try to ease him down peacefully.....i dont know if i helped and sorry if its so long...but i know how you feel...and i know it will eventually work out into a routine of some sorts and you will get through it. love and hugs, inny