Mother never said she loved me (because she didn't)
I never said l loved her either.

Oddly, at the end she was laying in the bed in the old peoples home golden child sis had put her in
looking sad lost and helpless. Thin, fragile, like a little baby bird that had fallen out of its nest.

I actually felt compassion for her, told her she didn't have to stay in that dreadful place, that I would take her back to her home.

She said no, we must wait and talk to Sue (golden child) first.
Sigh.
Must always obey GC.
Oh well I tried.
Dunno why l bothered anyway really.

I have much grief inside, locked away.
Deep grief not for mother 'per say' but for the mother I should have, had but never did.

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