So many different answers and experiences. I am gathering that there really isn't any one right answer.

One thing that I have decided is that it has to be an in-person conversation.

What I am learning about dating in modern times where there are so many ways to communicate, text, online dating, etc... that people can learn a lot about one another very quickly. We have already had a few very deep conversations about what we want and what our deal breakers are and we both agree that our biggest deal breaker is deception.

I feel it is only fair to let him know about my past, but I will do it in person. I think at this point, I don't want to waste my time with someone who doesn't want to be with me if he knows about the illness. On the other side of the coin, I don't want to waste his time either. We have both alluded to having "baggage" and that we appreciate our partners to be direct and honest, so I think we can probably talk about it pretty openly at this point. Bipolar is a part of me, as if I had diabetes, or any other chronic disease as as long as I am not running around doing dangerous and risky things (I never have) then it shouldn't be any more than telling someone that I have some other illness and that I may have times that I don't feel well. I also happen to have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, so those will probably flare up from time to time.

When I was on medication, I had bad reactions to it and was hospitalized about 10 times because of side effects that made my mental symptoms worse. What I have learned about myself is that I need to keep trying, be gentle with myself and seek support.

I have had a hard time, but I am picking up the pieces of my life and am doing a lot better than I was before. I still have my blips and depressive times, but I am invested in my treatment.

I am also working with a therapist to figure out if my diagnosis is accurate. I was diagnosed very quickly and was placed on a large amount of meds which immediately launched me into a 5 year tail spin. Once I was taken off ALL medication, I enjoyed stability for a long period of time with a few blips on the radar.

I don't think he needs to know everything I went through, at least not yet, but I do think I owe him the courtesy of letting him know that I have this condition and that I am doing well.

I am nervous about talking about it, but as I said I don't want to waste anyone's time pretending if the illness is going to be a deal breaker.