Thank you for all the wonderful support. I am feeling more calm today, but no better otherwise. I've decided to call a T tomorrow and try my best to KNOW what's wrong with me, regardless. I've been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and before that, with severe depression. I don't know if disorders can "change," but I think it's more severe if anything. And I really need to stop freaking out about it.

Anyway, I wish I could just take a pill that erases my past memories so I could be normal.

Thanks again.