I don't know that much about him, and I'm unconcerned about knowing him better in particular; I'm neither happy nor unhappy about it. However, what I do notice is that his tension around making sure he doesn't disclose even the most inconsequential details of his personal life frequently corrupts our exchange, and that does end up being frustrating. When something I've stated as a normal part of conversation causes him to feel prompted to share some or another personal detail, he gets like a threatened cat with his hair standing on end, and then it's weird, puts a vibe into the room as if I'm trying to know him better so I can stalk him or something, which I have literally zero interest in. Despite having been given all his phone numbers I have used ever only his office number, only infrequently and with regard only to appointment management.

He doesn't even manage to come out of it, stays hypervigilant with that frightened look on his face for minutes following, and then never reunites with whatever calm he had exhibited previously.

It's an exhausting example of his counter-transference that I am apparently in no position to help prevent, since anything I might say to try to assure him of my true lack of interest in his personal life is perceived as another attempt to make him feel relaxed so that he lets something slip.