Quote:
Originally Posted by Inner_Firefly
Argonautomobile, your post is so appreciated. I remember how extremely courteous you were to encourage your T to look after the crisis patient, in the middle of your session. What you said about T being late often because you don't scream at him, I understand what you mean! Will you ask your T? I asked mine the exact same question and she said NO, she wasn't late because I was considerate; she had other reasons. I find your advice very wise and helpful, to use "I" statements and to not assume T's feelings. I get confused about filtered vs unfiltered, because usually T encourages me to talk freely, so I wonder if there are exceptions in cases of angry feelings. Anyway it is nice to know you understand!
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Cheers! I may ask my T---and I certainly will let you know what he says if I do. Again, I'm about 90% sure this is the case (even if he doesn't cop to it!)--but I wouldn't want you to read the same thing into your T's behavior. I think she told you the truth, I really do. It seems pretty clear that her lateness and inconsistency are about her juggling her managerial role, not about anything you have or haven't done. She's been totally up-front about it and has not lavished you with praise for your patience.
My T has no such role, never says why he's late, and always says "I
really appreciate your patience" in a way that implies pretty clearly that he'd be sorry to lose it.
Don't know if that's helpful, but I think there are telling differences in our respective experiences.
Good luck and happy holidays!