I should add that not all avoidants are like that, and some try really hard to make their relationships work. And I guess some are just happy the way they are, and that's OK too. There are reasons why someone might have an avoidant attachment style, and the link CopperStar gave is actually a really good read. I'm anxious-preocuppied so I have stuff that I'm working on too that are negative, no ones perfect!