I remember being in eighth grade and i was probably having PMS blues? I was home alone and feeling scared and crying etc etc etc. My parents were three blocks away playing cards at a relatives, it was a friday night, not even a big saturday party night where they would stay out until 2. Anyway i called and asked my mother to come home because i wasnt feeling well, and she said she wouldnt because the host of the card game would get mad at her. So i never asked again. I shut that sucker down. Sucker being my feelings. Now it seems to me that t is trying to get me to open that sucker back up, so to speak! with him being a safe place to do it. Its all on me, i cant blame his unwillingness or unavailability or awkwardness or anything, dang him!