It's Christmas Eve and I feel... disappointed.

And then I feel silly about being disappointed. I don't know... I was trying to suss out why I felt this way. I mean, it's been a difficult month what with my husband having his grandmother pass. Then my parents were due to come but had a sudden health issue so, while things are now on the mend, they are not here.

It's like those two things make minor irritations feel like massive disappointments. I'm like, "This shouldn't feel like a big deal!"

And then I stuff it down and pretend like it's not bothering me but IT IS BOTHERING ME but it's not something that warrants me sitting other people down and being like, "Let's talk about this..." It's like I have to find a way to feel my disappointment on a spectrum somewhere.

I promise I'm sober :-/