A cheeseburger without cheese!

How long has this been going on? Are the folks in Wisconsin okay with this?

At what point does it cease to be a cheeseburger? Do we have to assemble the burger with slices of cheese once then we take out those slices to a trash bin?

One might think it is a LIE, perpetuating a lie is not okay as a society, the fabric of American society is already ablaze, you can't pour gasoline into it. At first food "restaurant", they use American cheese, don't they? Quintessential American food has been under attack, you have liberty/freedom at one side, on the other, you need to take responsibility for this. How would you respond to this madness!

A lot of people don't take no for an answer, they insist their way. You give no, once, twice then observe and think more, and after some time, you make an educated guess, which in my case will be an uneducated one but they are the same thing, I'll try to be truthful for that moment and my response could get dismissed in a split second by the recipient of the word. I took my time damnit, my words and action don't speak to you at all? Of course I could handle this with smiles once I get over a big hump, I can't be weary of this situation I put myself in, it is my world as well as theirs.

I think that any conversation that I have with anyone is constructed with so many ambiguities, sometimes they come out of my mouth quite intentionally. Then I often find myself asking/guessing what others are really saying to me, "What do you really want from me, just tell me and I can give you an answer in a second or two." Even if I say it out loud, the conversation goes no where, more often than I'd like to admit.

What I meant by "undeducated guess" is that I haven't talked with many people in my life, you could probably imagine going through a day without uttering a single word to anyone, you multiply that with 365, then multiply that with 5,6, 10yrs, who knows, it's ungodly long time anyways. This has been what my life is like for me so far. I think this has been a little problematic for me as of late, at first I got this job after years of unemployment, it was only natural to lose most of my personal time, to read things on the internet, to watch tv, that sort of things. They were by choice, then I stopped taking meds and seeing a doctor, and there are no psychotherapists that look good to me in my area. How can I go that route when there's no shred of normalcy intact, it doesn't matter now.

(False) expectation on my part can be taken care of easily. Deception, manipulation, and dissection of my own thoughts/actions can be worked on more. Essentially I need to lie ... what true to me could be untruth to someone else.

Let me get back to the cheeseburger situation a bit. Let's just say I'm a cashier at a fast food establishment, taking an order of a cheeseburger without cheese. I don't know what their worker's manual would say about the right conduct there, guess I'm gonna find that out later. Anyhow, for the sake of the argument, the customer is a she. Even if I get into her pants, even if I try so hard to walk in her shoes by getting to know her personally, I probably wouldn't know why she'd order the way she does. People say "Kids these days..." If this was obvious untrue statement that everybody ignores, our communication tools along with the society itself might collapse.

I hear it happens at a common establishment, that's what commons eat, and it may be a common place that happens at your local restaurant. The impact will be huge in our future, if a simple burger without a slice of cheese, that's highly processed, gooey, bubbly and melty cheese is in fact could be called a cheeseburger, then I see a gigantic problem there. Even if the person who's taking the order get fired, even if you are a customer next in line or on the next line, someone should say something there. With love and no judgement at all.

We can make a joke about it all we want, but that's what we have John Stewart for, he can put his fist into the air and entertain us, notify us of the world we live in. You could guess what I'm gonna say by now that we do have responsibilities of our own.

The cheeseburger tail ends here, the work today was a killer, too busy, I got 4hrs of sleep and it should've been enough but my mind was ..here with the burger since last night! Not normal is it? This is where I'm still having trouble is. I browsed through only three interesting looking posts last night, after I got coffee going after midnight to do some house cleanings plus the laundry with a 'Twin Tub Washing mashine'!! Does anyone know what that is? I was reading a review for this product on walmart.com, this guy was raving how environmentally awesome this was, and what he wasn't saying was that it takes hours to do just one load for other normal washing machine. It is a work!

So, yea, I came here to read and just chill, I wasn't even in a current event section, I still haven't got details on the shootings. I'd like to work on this awkwardness of mine for the next year. I do okay-ish with real person(s) though, I think I've gotten used to see where I should draw the line to not get too invested. A lot less than being an acquaintances with anyone is what I usually do. I used to think these were my choice, and now, it has become a necessity.

Over 40 yrs. The first with my own parents, right? Common folks, or are they? I don't know what they are, my mother will be getting a blood soaked letter like I was planning for longest time, with some words on it. I tried to send it off earlier, then I found out that I erased all the contact info off my apartment, now I'm waiting on her to send me a yearly new year card, so I can do what I set out to do. Aweful? You can get the F on, it is still, just so personal.

The moral values that I have probably comes from what my mother taught me in my childhood, however little she taught me. I need to throw all that out of the window, there's no specific plans, that's part of who I am. I must know what to say or do at any given moment with a right attitude. So with no degrees under my belt, no career to speak of, and tell a story in a success story thread, that ain't gonna happen. Ever.

The house cleaning, my clatter free by the end of the year plan will fail. Oh, I'm sure it will. Wasted all most a day again, thinking ain't so bad, I'm back to my own entertainer of my life, it's a good thing.

Meds talk. It's still loaded with *blank* here, isn't it? That is anti-psychiatry! What is your agenda!! Take it somewhere else, would ya? What struck me amazing last night was that how insightful and how much they've paid attention for years for what's been happening in their lives, they are definitely on a truth finding mission of theirs, they remember good, unlike myself, and write well. Good writers, what's not to like about them?

By the way, does anyone use ignore feature? I think I'll never need it, whether you know it or not, I stay the **** away from my ancient laptop when I'm not in the mood/busy and that is enough. Last night's thread was a little unexpected though, knew there was a trigger icon for the thread, I thought I could handle it, then bam! New ideas and any thoughts especially when it's not your own are potentially dangerous, I sometimes have to wonder how y'all mingle with others offline as well as online here on PC or elsewhere.

Well, it's getting late, I should wrap this up. But how? Why? Who am I? We look back and check on our progresses from time to time, we get thrown around in the exact same subject you thought you got through, the new set of eyes can burn all to the ground, then you'll still know that you get back up from the ashes, it's the belief system that's been constructed since I came hang around in this place, your validation is right here.

Am I treatment resistant? I'm just anti social, pharmaceutical companies can work more with less for whom really needs the medications,

Where did the cheese go?

The day will come, the day we'll be eating a burger with a franken cheese on top of a franken beef patty. Unless she's allergic to dairy products, I'd love her to take the cheeseburger with a slice of cheese in it. She does not need to conform to somebody else's ideologies, for now, she shall have the burgers she wanted, I know what she means, now, after 24hrs! I'm not so totally cut out for the job, arn't I?

It may be a little early but happy 2016!

ETA: Jack the sparrow flew back today, hopped a lot closer to me than usual, and I'm thankful for its gesture. This work cat, he showed up late for dinner tonight, but instead of disgusting assortment of human food the day before, he got sushi plate with the side of another grilled fish plate, it was an awesome sight, he cleaned out the sushi just the way I thought this little bugger would be, he ate only the sliced fish part and left the rice for me to clean up. The mall cop saw me walking with the plate, was a little awkward. Now he's officially a freeganism buddy of mine, cats are territorial, aren't they? I know there are a few cats around in the area, I hope he can spread the word so I can feed them all, as long as I'm there. We get too much food waste there, there really should be some sort of system in place to help folks who go hungry. Less CO2 that way... I had to help throw away lots of Christmas related stuff too, what a waste, huh? A black backed wagtail was there too again, it is a waterbird originally, hence the way he runs around. Always pecking on a concrete ground. I want these three musketeers to sit on my lap, then I'll be extremely happy.

I went into work without a shower, unshaven, this can't happen two days in a row, been having less sleep and tons of work at work, I wish I were more in control of everything, I see no break in sight though, a bit of nagging problem at work, the relationship with the morning shift guy has been good, I got over it. I have talked with my boss not long ago, I have to believe everything's alright there, I believe I can move a mountain of doubt if it ever comes to that but I don't ask for it. Time for bed, g'night.