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Old Aug 18, 2007, 09:28 PM
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finestitcher finestitcher is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2007
Location: South Central Pennsylvania
Posts: 73
Hi, I am new to this forum. I am 58 yrs old, and I have survived much in my life time.

I survived the ugliness of my childhood at the hands of my mental unstable father to the point that my sisters and I don't have any memories of holidays, birthdays, etc. or anything else about your childhood...except the fear that we still hold on too...sadly.

I survived the neglect of my husband of 17 yrs...now deceased.

I survived the abusive behavior of my son, who was neglected by his father. Whether this lead to his abusive behavior, I don't know. I do know though that he still scares me today when I am around him...he is 33 yrs old now. He has begun to process his behavior, which I am greatful for and has begun to control his angry outbursts, but this has not helped me feel safe. My fear of him many years ago during his teenage years was so great that I would simply freeze in my tracks or seat, waiting, just waiting...

I have terrible issues with male beings. It is very hard for me to be around males. They make me feel insecure and vulnerable. Waiting, just waiting...I have been single for 22 years now.

I have survived much more, but not relevant to the PTSD topic.
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It is only by following your deepest instinct that you can lead a rich life, and if you let your fear of consequence prevent you from following your deepest instinct, then your life will be safe, expedient and thin.-- Katharine Butler Hathaway