Hello SomethingWitty1: I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. I had a difficult relationship with my parents as well, perhaps not as bad as what you describe, but difficult enough. In my case, though, it is probably true that I caused as much harm as I was issued. It's difficult to say. I'm an older person now. And my parents have been gone for many years.

I moved away to attend graduate school & never went back, except for a couple of uncomfortable visits. It was sad, I guess, especially since I was an only child. Yet, in retrospect, I don't really regret it... at least not any more than I regret allot of what I did in my younger years.

I do think that, in the end, you have to take care of yourself. And if you simply can't have a healthy relationship with your parents, then at some point you too may have to simply put them at arm's length. It will no doubt hurt. But the alternative may hurt even more. You may find that some therapy will be needed in order to help you sort through your feelings & come to the best solution for you. In the meantime, please keep posting, here on PC. It can help too. I wish you well...