Quote:
Originally Posted by Seraphine
Does anyone else find that they have friends they are intensely close to, some they lose interest in quickly, and some they end up explosively breaking up with? Is it normal for borderlines tip have really intense friendships?
|
Yes ! At least for me. I do have intense emotions that I sometimes can't seem to control. Most of the time I certainly wish this wasn't the case. I've seen how less emotional people channel their emotions in a different way other than raising their voice or crying too much.
All I know is that it has been this way since I was a child. Now you can call it BPD or whatever you want but it has ruined many a relationship. The thing is that I feel justified in my emotional state at a certain time.
Because of this state of mind I have lost all the people I once new. It's like I'm just stating out of the crib and have no mommy to care for me and no daddy to protect me.
I have to learn the basic skills of living, and more tortuously , with myself , because I am alone. I also have to deal with physical issues , like chronic pain. If I were able to channel the emotional energy I have right now into electricity I would be able to light up all of California at night and daytime.
Yet I can't seem to be able to channel one spark towards a positive result for myself.
I'll tell you this much. I've learned to try and find out what all the triggers are ,or may be, so that I can learn to control my emotional responses.
I want to make a new life and not repeat the mistakes of the past.
And maybe make some new friends along the way.
Besides , losing some of the people I knew was really a blessing in disguise.