Thank you both very much. I want to take your advice but it is trying. I keep telling myself that I will listen to this song just one more time. But I've said that over and over again. I did just take the Clozaril. In fact, I just now took my evening meds (1:30 AM). My husband (and constant reminder) is not here. Perhaps it will help? I'm not feeling particularly tired at the moment. I don't know why I am such an idiot and can't focus on things that I need to do. Instead, I practice self-destructive behavior.