Hi everyone. This is the first time on this particular forum category, but not my first time at psychcentral which I've been a member of for many years. Anyway, just want to add something from my own experiences with (1) being bullied; (2) being "bully-proofed" by my therapist; (3) myself as an extrovert; (4) my significant other is an introvert, I'm an extrovert, and we sort of balance each other out. I was bullied as a child because I was different from other children. I was a good student, studied hard, was funny, etc etc and also was a musician. I was also bullied by an occasional co-worker or supervisor, even though everyone else liked and appreciated me. A therapist bully-proofed me and now I don't get bullied anymore -- savfe for over 12 years. I do not know how the therapist bully-proofed me, but somehow I just overcame my fear of other people. I changed my lifestyle when I was younger to avoid weird and difficult relationships. I started two sequential self-employed service businesses. I discovered that I am unable to work a "regular job," in an office, which was where my skills are. When I started my own business, suddenly I was getting compliments constantly -- several times a week -- instead of negativity and constant criticism and bullying. Years ago, too, I stopped going to family celebrations like Christmas and Thanksgiving. One or two family members gave me a really hard time about that decision!! For 3 years of celebrations I refused to attend; they finally gave up the pressure, when they figured out I was serious and permanent in my decision. Now I celebrate major holidays with close friends instead. When I went to a family member's home for these holidays, there was always a lot of strife -- and guess who was blamed???? Me! Finally, I expalineid that I did not get along with the large groups of family, that I got along fine with people one-to-one. So when I dropped out, now other members of the family are the scapegoats. Ha ha ha! I was never the cause of these fights in the first place. Finally, the family stopped inviting me to their gatherings, and I am not really "a part" of the family in a way. This makes me rather sad -- but only because my "image" and belief that family harmony can be real, at least for some few families, does not fit the reality of my family. My two nephews, who live in the same city as me, have large dogs that bark, sniff my crotch, and jump up on me. So I have made it clear that I will not visit the nephews. I like good dogs -- not "bad owners" who let or make their dogs be bad dogs. So anyway, there are some of my means of getting out of being bullied -- I "just say no" to situations and life styles where there are bullies around. I have also learned to "walk away" when someone is saying or doing something offensive. Some people in the apt. building where I live make derogatory racist comments or ugly gossip and name-calling behind the backs of some of the other people that live here. When I've been in a group of people who trash others, I just say, "I don't really agree with you," then calmly walk away from the group. When I was younger, I used to try to say positive things to turn the conversations around and "help the people see others in a positive way." I found out this tactic does not work. As far as I know, nobody changes their mind, and the conversation usually reverts back to trashing or gossiping. So now I just check out of the conversation. Guess what -- I never hear stuff like this from the very same people. They like me and we get along fine -- in the hallways. Let them vent at someone else -- not me.