I think what is so hard for us non-PDs to understand is the utter contempt that most PDs have for the rest of us.

A lot of PDs say that they develop their behavior because of abuse and a inappropriate defense mechanisms.

A lot of us non-PDs just see it as just behaving abusively and cruel.

I grew up with emotional and physical abuse and I am not abusive OR cruel. And yes, I would say my parents definitely have PDs themselves.