I understand where you're coming from to a degree. It's not screaming but the inability to ahi my brain off is something I can absolutely relate to. I play video games to try and channel my thoughts even though most of the time it's only a temporary relief. The worst thing is when I'm alone especially at night. That's when my self destructive/overly critical thoughts come rolling in. I'm sorry to hear that you're dealing with those burdens. I suppose the brighter side of things is that ailments like ours are more socially acceptable in today's age. Still medical science continues to fail us and leave us with our personal struggles.