Quote:
Originally Posted by Petra5ed
Do you know why you are driving past? Do you think you could be trying to sabotage the therapy relationship?
I think a lot of us have this urge, and a lot of us have done it. Telling her though does pose some risk. I think my therapist once said the only thing I could do to get him to fire me was come to his house, but he followed that with, and knock on his door.
|
Along similar lines, I wonder if it's not so much intentionally sabotaging the relationship, but testing it? Like wondering if your T will still accept you if you admit to driving by her house?
I did some testing of my marriage counselor (not driving by house, but other stuff, like telling him things--I had some transference going on). He said it was OK and that it's like what kids do to their parents (or some people might do in a romantic relationship). Kids will talk back to their parents or say they hate them or something like that because they need to know their parent will love or accept them no matter what. It can be that way with a T, too.
So that would explain your urge to tell her. If it was just curiosity, and you drove by and saw it, then I doubt you'd feel the need to tell her. But you probably want to know that it's OK, that she still accepts you even though you did that. Like maybe you fear abandonment, possibly from stuff that happened in the past with important people in your life? Not sure what to suggest in terms of telling her though...