Yes, we can still deeply miss and want to be with an abuser, even when they've abused.. as others have pointed it, their moments of niceness and the good times are the hooks... then they abuse again. The cycle of abuse repeats itself.. they're nice, then they abuse, then they apologize with flowers, tears, and candy, we forgive, things are good again until they abuse again. Wanting the good times back is a powerful hook... sincere apologies and promises to not repeat behaviors is a powerful hook. With abuse, the best thing you can do for yourself is walk away entirely, no matter how hard or painful it is.. and no matter how much you miss them. Preserving your self-esteem, self-worth and mental health are worth it! No matter how lonely it gets... reach out to others instead during those lonely times, those who are healthier and better for you, who treat you with kindness and respect. (((((((big hugs)))))))