For a long time, I've felt that it'd be great to have a platonic friendship with a guy.. I'm always afraid of men trying it on. I'm afraid it'd bring out my craziness as I just don't want them near me. I have a really hard time being physically close to anyone, really, but men in particular. I guess it goes back to fearing my dad would start hitting me.. And maybe some of it comes from my mum, too, as her dad was a seriously violent alcoholic, and she used to tell me those awful stories when I was little.. She never should have!

Some of it is definitely about my own insecurities and feeling like it's impossible for anyone to like me ever.

JustJenny, thank you so much for the advice to concentrate on one's own self! That is really great advice