I just saw this part of your answer quoted and made me think. Something about the way you phrased it, of handing of power to someone, seems not how I would put it and yet I don't know how I would say it. I mean this might be presuming that we have the power to hand it over, and maybe we don't have the power or that particular kind of power. Maybe all we doing is simply exposing our vulnerability, our sense of being lost or vulnerable, to someone that we've deem worthy of our trust. So we put our guard down as we feel safe enough to trust and let another person see our naked pain and helps us get to the bottom of it.

I think this happens even on this forum. I've at times made a post then deleted it and seen others do the same. Why? Because suddenly we may doubt the trustworthiness of others, fear having overshared. The vulnerability seems dangerous so we protect ourselves. And other times the forum feels like a home and we are not even thinking about it and share and share and then suddenly somebody says something that comes across as hurtful, even with no malice, and we suddenly feel overexposed.

I believe what trust does require is vulnerability and uncertainty. If we knew exactly what was going to happen, we wouldn't need to trust someone. There must be some uncertainty. It's almost as if we're taking a journey and the therapist is the guide and we're walking over some really rocky places and our feet hurting, but T says, "Trust me it will get better" or "Trust me, this is the right path."

Given that often people repress or deny their problems, it does seem logical enough that when we face them, it hurts. So if we go by the idea that if it hurts, it's bad, then we go back to the old way of being, but then life is much less rich and we live in a very limited frightful circle. So we go for therapy and face depression and anxiety and past traumas. But therapist says that with his help and his teachings and the tools he gives us along the way, we will be able to go on and face our demons. That requires trust, but it can be built, especially as we see the result of therapy.

Also I don't think trust is a all or none kind of thing. I trust my sister and my parents and my relatives and my therapist and neighbor and my friend, but to different degrees. And some people I don't trust at all, for instance, a psychopath.

But to bring it back to power, I don't believe therapy works well if the power differential feels threatening enough that we refuse to trust the T. Somebody once said that she trusts only people who have no power or potential to hurt her. But to me that's not trust. That's reality. I mean if I live with an ant, I don't need to trust the ant to be nice to me. The cute little ant can't hurt me (or can it?!! ) But if I am forced to live with a person who previously stabbed someone, I need to be able to trust he won't hurt me, if I'm ever gonna get a few hours of sleep.