Hello.

I've read a lot of psych lit stating that some BDSM activities and fetishes are not inherently bad or unhealthy. Instead sexuality presents itself in a million different ways and flavors for the millions of people on the planet.

I feel drawn toward some of the lighter aspects of BDSM like sensory play and voyeurism and exhibitionism, and even the submissive role. But so much else I really can't wrap my head around and can even be repulsed by it. Like ropes and furniture and pain, etc. It all seems so dark to me. And yet I somehow want to engage with this community because it seems necessary to get the aspects that I do want. At the 'parties' around here, it seems like you have to be willing to share the space with some other stuff you might not want.

Just curious if anyone here might some input or experience to draw on. I'm on fetish network site but I feel so awkward and inexperienced sexually-- so vanilla-- to even discuss it on there.

Any thoughts appreciated.