After a year away, in a strange city, with a million ups and downs, I'm moving back home and starting a new chapter in my life. Moving back home also means going back to T. Long story short: I couldn't find a T where I moved last January what with being in school and lacking transportation so I had limited hours I could possibly go, so I've been without this whole time.

My T at home knows the big stuff that's happened this year as she has allowed me to call/text her when need be. We have a long standing relationship. January 2016 will mark the beginning of our 9th year together. I haven't seen her on a regular basis all of that time, but I've seen her for a lot of it, and even when we've been away, she's been there for me.

I'm excited to go back, relieved even...but I'm also nervous. Right now I have so many things I want to say and to work on, but I'm scared that once I'm back on that couch, in my corner (I've always sat on the right hand side of the couch facing the door in the corner and it quickly became a comfort thing and now I won't sit anywhere else), I'll clam up like I do all too often. I'm thinking of writing a letter, so that I can give it to T and have that be a point of reference. I used to do that all the time when there were big things I wanted to bring up but didn't exactly know how.