I'm sorry you are so depressed and in this situation with a person who sounds like a complete jerk. You have tried your best and he has been beating you down so much that you are starting to believe what he says. He is very wrong. Keep up the studying and aim to get away from him. It's harder said than done I know but you will be much better off without him. I also strongly suggest you get counseling for yourself or couples counseling if he will go too. I sort of doubt he would go but you never know. Please take good care of yourself. Much love and peace to you dear.