I have two best friends. One of them has CPTSD and needs a lot of support, and the other one is the single mother of a one-year-old. Therapy is 50 minutes where I just focus on myself, which is something I really need, even if I have my emotional needs met by other people. My two therapists provide support I could not get elsewhere, as well as professional guidance so I can grow and change as a person in ways that are healthy.

However, my close relationship with one of them has been very healing for me. It has been nurturing and reparative in nature, and has meant a lot to me. I wasn't abused or neglected as a child, but I was very misunderstood; I was seen as a problem child and didn't receive a lot of compassion. I learned that I was bad, and I would remain undiagnosed bipolar until I was 23. So finally having my struggles validated by someone, being told I should be proud of myself for being where I am today, being practically showered with compassion and understanding… these are things that have really mattered to me. She is teaching me that I need to be kind to myself. I still struggle with it, but not as much, and it is thanks to my relationship with this therapist. Therefore I do not agree that therapy can't or shouldn't meet emotional needs, because for some people it definitely can, and there is nothing wrong with it. My therapist hugs me, tells me that she loves me, calls me precious, and says that she's proud of me. I have spent years being emotionally closed off before I met this woman, but now I am being taught how to accept love and kindness, and how to give it as well. I'm in therapy because I hate myself; my self-hatred is at the centre of every problem I have. I am mean to myself, all the time. I have lived most of my life thinking that I deserve to be miserable, and no one else I know has picked up on the severity of my self-abuse. She is the first one to point it out and make me aware of it. I really needed her. I still do.

So I don't think having close relationships with other people could ever "replace" therapy, at least not for me. I will be in therapy for as long as I need to, regardless of what happens in life on the "outside". I don't believe a partner could ever be some kind of substitute for someone with several years of therapy training.