Hey. Yeah, I'm fairly sure I was dx'd with dysthymia at some point or other...

I remember a time where I couldn't remember a time that I'd ever felt happy to be alive, vital, energetic, or anything like that.

The drugs helped me 'numb out' for a while... Kinda helped mask the symptoms, I guessed. Didn't make me feel happier just didn't make me care so much about feeling so bad.

What helped me most... Was seeing a caring, sympathetic, and emotionally attuned therapist. Being able to generalise from that a little so that I could get involved more in having positive experiences with people outside therapy. When it is a whole way of being change takes time. It can be a wonderful, wonderful progression, though. Moments of hope and happiness... And over time the horrible despair receeds so that episodes become further apart and not as intense when they strike.

In the meantime... Hang in there. Hope you have some positive interactions here at psychcentral :-)