Well, I think boundaries set the structure for the working relationship. Jeez...I'd have to think on that...a good working definition of the term. Boundaries, basically rules. Obvious boundaries would include not having a sexual relationship with a client, or dual relationship, but boundaries can also revolve around session time limits, touch, disclosure, and out of session contact, just to name a few. I've read that boundaries are to protect the client.... well, my T maintains boundaries to protect herself. I set "boundaries" in how often my brother can come free-load at my house. He also has very poor hygiene, so another one I have is that if he DOES come over, he needs to shower. I set boundaries for my son all the time, but they can be negotiable to a point. I set boundaries for my pets. My horses are not to bite me, (I 'bite back'). my cats are not allowed on the counter, and my dog is not allowed to jump up on me. I've set a boundary with my temporary room mate. If my door is closed, I want to be left alone. I NEED my space, and boundaries needed to be set because she is incredibly needy/whiney, and likes to talk, and I like my space, and can be very quiet and kept to myself when I'm having a bad day.

So I don't want to say I think boundaries are "bad," they are not, and really they are a requirement...I'm one who has allowed people to walk all over me at some points in my life, and setting boundaries have helped.

I think in therapy though, being so one sided (which is why it works), boundaries can let a client know they are safe in that environment. But when there's too much inconsistency, that can be very damaging and dangerous. I think some boundaries ought to just stay consistent. Like touch...if you do not like using touch in therapy that's fine, but stick with that, don't stray from it for awhile, then shut it down again. Contact. T's can choose to allow contact or not, but they should stick with that too. A friend of mine on here was allowed to text her T...only to have her T appear to take it away. I guess I understand if the client is abusing the priviledge, but the T should say up front that excessive text/Emails are not ok. And set a boundary. 2 Emails per week, etc.... I'm NOT saying this from experience, because my T highly encourages Emails between sessions, and I always limited myself. She nags me to keep Emailing her, and that's a boundary I set for myself. I'm not going to Email her unless I want to, and have something to say.