I don't think boundaries and rules are quite the same. The rules set by the therapist in psychotherapy -- show up on time, pay on time :-) let them know within 24 hours if one has to cancel, email or no email, no sexual contact, etc. have to do with the actual therapy situation itself and I do not think should be taken personally. Personal boundaries -- hugs or handshakes, gifts, perhaps some language/other physical issues -- those things each person has their own feelings about, hence the "personal" aspect, and I don't think another person's boundaries should necessarily impact our own. A therapist is doing their own thing, hopefully therapeutically-wise, and that's not my problem. If they allow hugs then decide not to allow hugs, I let them know that might be painful for me as I enjoy hugs but then I look at it therapeutically and investigate why hugging at this time might not be a good idea for me in therapy/this relationship. I try to remember it is always therapy and not a "normal" relationship so I try to think of what is going on between myself and my therapist in light of my therapy, not my personal desires.