Quote:
Originally Posted by atisketatasket
I see the distinction you're making, and I think it is a real one, but it seems to me most therapists would fall into neither category. Most therapists are not psychiatrists and therefore don't have institutional power. I'm not sure what you mean by new age therapists, but neither of mine set themselves up as a guru, and that seems to be the case with a good number of therapists described on the forum (not all, though). So where does that rather large middle of mental health professionals get the power they are perceived to have?
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Working with people who are hurting, desperate to be cared for, and are looking for a connection. I felt therapy was hurting me for a long time but I was terrified of leaving because I loved her and she told me she loved me. When you're in pain and feel alone and depressed, feeling safe/loved like that is everything. In my case, I believe she did love me at one point(or thought she loved me, you don't hurt people you love and not care), but it gave her a *huge* power advantage because I would have done anything to keep her in my life. And she forgot her role was to help me and didn't even try to minimize any damage.
I think for people with different personalities/stories/hurts, it's hard to understand this dynamic or how strong the pull is to feel like someone loves you. It's why cults use "love bombing." For someone like me with abandonment issues, who was alone and struggling, the power came *from* that relationship. It was unhealthy and kind of codependent, but at the time, I basically would have done anything to have her in my life.
Yes, this sounds totally mentally unhealthy, but that's why I was in therapy in the first place. AND why I ended up so damaged by what happened.