I also think we lose sight of the idea of boundaries being there to help the client.

Stuff like, "It's okay to call me, but no more than once a week in case of emegency because it's not healthy to rely so much on me."

Or "I don't mind if you call me in crisis, but you have to go through these things first and if I don't answer the phone, then move on and call a crisis line, go to the hospital, etc, because I can't always answer the phone and you need to keep yourself safe anyway."

There's so much emphasis on boundaries being for the therapist, without much thought about whether they harm the client.

My therapist was willing to give 100% of herself for 5 years which made me feel loved and special. The problem was when she no longer wanted to do that and pulled a 180. I was set up to be hurt not just from when she changed the boundaries but from the beginning. It wss all about what she wanted to do or could handle, and she didn't cwe about keeping me safe. It's a serious problem if the biundaries shift severely according to a therapist's whim.i know therapists are human, but there are ways to do things while minimizing harm. I read so many stories on here where the therapists forget about that and cause further damage.