Quote:
Originally Posted by YMIHere
I think it's interesting that there are more people who believe that the Therapist holds the power. The only logical conclusion I can come to regarding that is that people are often seeking therapy at their worst. Likely they are there because they feel powerless and out of control.
For me, my therapist has set the stage by telling me "What this means is that you would come to session and talk about whatever you wanted and I would work with you on uncovering your emotions so that you could feel more safe in certain situations as well as discovering a lot more about yourself and how are you organizing your behavior which we do unconsciously, which is why it makes it so difficult to change our behavior."
Nothing happens until I start it. Therefore I have the power. At least that's how I see it.
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There's a certain irony in this post, especially when you more or less say: 'I know I have power because my therapist told me I did.'
If you have power, nobody needs to tell you that you have it. It's obvious. And also, if you have power, there does not need to be a complex set of structures to protect you from the therapist in the form of social and sexual boundaries.
Honestly, I think anyone who doesn't acknowledge that the therapist has the power is in a form of denial. Maybe it's too uncomfortable to admit that someone who puts hard lines around how and when you can contact them is definitely the one in charge. Therapists play power games constantly in a myriad of forms - even the good ones.
I just think most people either overlook it, don't particularly care, or don't want to deal with the cognitive dissonance the therapy relationship creates.
People who are sensitive to power dynamics are going to be incapable of ignoring it though. I actually think people who are aware of the power dynamic in therapy are more able to protect themselves than people who pretend it isn't there. A lot of people get blindsided when the power imbalance suddenly hits home unexpectedly.
Your therapist decides when you meet, how long you meet for, whether you can email them outside therapy, whether they will suddenly go away for a few days or three months - the client has essentially no control in a therapy relationship apart from maybe what to talk about in session.
And I think that's where you're confusing your ability to pick the topic you talk about with who actually wields the power - because they're not the same thing. You can pick the topic sure, but it will a) cost you and b) end when the therapist dictates it should end (the end of the session.)
Pretending that makes you in control is just... inaccurate.