There's a certain irony in this post, especially when you more or less say: 'I know I have power because my therapist told me I did.'

If you have power, nobody needs to tell you that you have it. It's obvious. And also, if you have power, there does not need to be a complex set of structures to protect you from the therapist in the form of social and sexual boundaries.

Honestly, I think anyone who doesn't acknowledge that the therapist has the power is in a form of denial. Maybe it's too uncomfortable to admit that someone who puts hard lines around how and when you can contact them is definitely the one in charge. Therapists play power games constantly in a myriad of forms - even the good ones.

I just think most people either overlook it, don't particularly care, or don't want to deal with the cognitive dissonance the therapy relationship creates.

People who are sensitive to power dynamics are going to be incapable of ignoring it though. I actually think people who are aware of the power dynamic in therapy are more able to protect themselves than people who pretend it isn't there. A lot of people get blindsided when the power imbalance suddenly hits home unexpectedly.

Your therapist decides when you meet, how long you meet for, whether you can email them outside therapy, whether they will suddenly go away for a few days or three months - the client has essentially no control in a therapy relationship apart from maybe what to talk about in session.

And I think that's where you're confusing your ability to pick the topic you talk about with who actually wields the power - because they're not the same thing. You can pick the topic sure, but it will a) cost you and b) end when the therapist dictates it should end (the end of the session.)

Pretending that makes you in control is just... inaccurate.