Boundaries have significantly impacted my therapy life. I was very close to one of my therapists. What I loved about our work was how out-of-the-box she seemed. She wasn't at all what I had pictured when I imagined a therapist. She was fun - we laughed, we would bring treats to session to share, she would sometimes come with me to help me do some exposures (for OCD treatment), she was very relaxed with schedules, she texted, etc. Nothing we did was unethical and everything was mutually agreed upon.

Two years after I met her, my OCD got so bad that I went to a residential treatment program. I went in so naive. When I got there, and was sharing my past treatment history, what I described about my therapeutic relationship raised a lot of red flags with the residential program staff. I was told by them that I would never see that therapist again and our relationship was terminated against my will (I was a minor at the time). I had no idea that what I had perceived as a positive relationship would be taken so strongly.

My experience at the residential treatment program was severely negative from that point forward. It wasn't really explained to me why the relationship was so 'inappropriate'. It wasn't until I was discharged that I really began to understand that different therapists have different opinions on what boundaries are firm and what lines you do not cross with a client. It wasn't until then that I could begin to see how some other professionals might raise their eyebrows at my relationship with my former t. The next eight months after I was discharged were the hardest of my life. I was discharged to a complete stranger therapist and I was angry, hurt, confused, and really sad. I fought for eight months to go back to that first therapist and finish what we had started together. I eventually did but there was so much that happened in between. I learned a lot about boundaries through it all.

I do understand the importance of them but I think that unless there is something illegal or outright abusive or aggressive going on in the therapeutic relationship, therapists should focus solely on enforcing his or her own boundaries and not judging the boundaries of others in the profession. Because boundaries are very grey it seems and tampering with someone else's way of doing things can be more detrimental to the patient than not.