I am sorry to hear you are going through this. What she is doing is definitely not right. It is hard to deal with such a person who is convinced that other people are owing them something. Unfortunately, this is pretty common. Your post reminded me of this one:
http://forums.psychcentral.com/relat...bed-words.html

And there were much more threads about mother problems over the last couple of weeks.

You were approved for disability and that indicates that you have or have had some health issues. Why isn't she supportive of you? And why isn't she happy that you got approved? (Great news btw!)

You should not blame yourself for these problems you are having in this relationship. Does she have enough money to pay the bills and buy the necessities? If she is starving then you should indeed help her more, but it doesn't sound like this is the case.

Me and my mother we too have a strange relationship. It has nothing to do with money but she tends to be too involved in my life. We were having frequent fights and that would always bring me down. My solution (at least for now) was to limit the phone calls with her down to 1-2 a week and keep it short. I still feel bad about the quality of our relationship, but at least we are not fighting. That's my suggestion - distance yourself a little and don't talk to her too much.