Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna
I hope i wasnt saying to be realistic. I remember at least one time with current t i was extremely worried about his return from a conference. I think i googled ancestors he didnt even know he had! Okay slight exaggeration. But - the important thing is - not the ts action or inaction. It is the clients feeling - really scaring the pants off yourself - and how that is resolved with the t. Imo. So that the next time, the t doesnt have that "power", and the client doesnt have to try to control the t, or take that power from the t. I really dont like when someone tries to constrict my actions because of their "fear".
|
I sort of get what you're saying.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
But the therapist made the offer without any imploring from the client. That is the part here that, for me, would make it egregious. Plus, even if a client asked first and the therapist did not want to or felt constricted by the client's concern - it would be up to the therapist to clearly decline. This therapist made an offer she did not keep.
|
Right!
Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna
I understand that. But the work may be to deal with NOT getting the wish fulfilled. The part about me hating constriction is just for full disclosure of bias!.
|
That's a good point. I overreact to disappointment.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
You think the therapist set the client up just to mess with them? I rarely understand what you mean.
|
Thanks, sd.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick
Rainbow, I really think you need to have a talk with your T about this. Maybe you can work out something where your T does not promise anything and then you won't be so upset and disappointed.
|
I will see what she says. I agree she shouldn't make promises to me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog
I made the woman quit using the word promise as every time she said it - she did exactly the opposite within 2 weeks. I told her she obviously did not know what the word meant and to stop using it until she looked it up and could use it correctly.
Shortly thereafter - I got her to agree to not talk at all.
I think telling the therapist how they screwed up is useful.
|
You're so funny, sd. Maybe I should go in tomorrow, sit down, and the first words out of my mouth should be "you screwed up!" Maybe she'll come in with a cast and a good reason for not emailing, ha ha. If I do say, "you screwed up" I'll probably start laughing instead of being angry. I know you're not trying to be funny, or maybe you are. One never knows with stopdog.
Quote:
Originally Posted by atisketatasket
As unaluna's official translator, I think what she's saying is that an additional problem is the client's reaction to the therapist not fulfilling the promise. And that this is a problem because many people don't fulfill such a promise - they either forget or hate feeling constrained by such a promise.
|
Sounds reasonable. I get disappointed by people in my real life often.
Quote:
Originally Posted by venusss
You say she travels to far off places.
When I personally go to far off place, I come home and crash, being exhausted from the travel. And then there is different things to worry about, like adjusting to the gray world again and unpacking and scrapping the travel filth of yourself... it's often a mini culture shock.
And "work" is the last thing one wants to think about. Sure she cares about you and you are not "just" work, but you are part of the work world for her. Vacations are get aways, often even from your family and friends. Many people need that.
|
Very true. She probably had bills to pay. Yeah, I'm just part of her work world. That's kind of depressing but true.
Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna
More like a controlled experiment in the lab. Using a crash test dummy. Okay not exactly. But yeah. I keep picturing my t looking a little sheepish when he did it.
I can see why you - sd - wouldnt like this ploy; you think all your parts are excellent, and rightly so. Otoh, i disavow many of my parts, and if my t can shake off a foolish part using this method, i say go for it.
|
What?
Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna
Parn me but i cant resist - youre fired! 
|
LOL!!!