Ok 3 months on, I had all but accepted the situation, we were getting on ok, the finances are dire but once you accept that and move on then it becomes easier. We have been seeing a counsellor to deal with our separation but not for reconciliation. Things were ok. Until tonight. I came home from work to an empty house and an iPad still logged into her private email account. I looked and just found a snippet of info to say 99% certain that she had slept with someone in the summer. This goddess of a woman who i respected so much for having the guts to call an end to our marriage couldn't wait until the end and snuck off while away for a job interview. I'm not foolish to think that this was the reason we are parting but it has put a final part of the jigsaw in place. She told me 3 months before this happens that it wasn't about sex and she wouldn't care if she never did "it" again. This is the only thing I didn't believe as she has always been a sexual person. Never did I think she would do "it" again before I had even moved out.
How do I process this emotionally and legally? We both have shared asset in the house and she has said previously that when it is sold she would look for a larger share given my slightly larger salary. Does this put me in a stronger position or does it not mean a thing in the longer term? In the end it won't mean much as once the estate agent and solicitors have finished there won't be much to show for both of us.
As officewarrior above put it, I was focussed on the money side of things for a bit but I'd accepted that supporting two houses is crippling for anyone and kind of embraced the thought of living alone. Now this has happened I have become more defensive and have started to think differently.
Sorry for the rant but it's been quite an evening....,

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